By Katherine Zammuto
DATING RULES THAT YOU CAN TOSS IN THE TRASH IN 2023
During this almost three years I have been doing my Podcast Kat on the Loose -sex, dating & relationships, I have spoken to several dating coaches, experts and matchmakers. In general, most of them suggest a bunch of dating rules, some good, some bad and some kind of absurd to be honest.
Here I share the ones I think you should completely forget about:
RULE 1: NEVER EVER TEXT AN EX:
I actually think this rule is unhealthy and I will tell you why: keeping things you might want to say bottled up inside just messes up with your emotions eve more. I believe in always following your gut and your heart, and never ever leaving things unsaid. Even if the person you are communicating with does not care, you should do what feels right for you – it will give you peace of mind and more closure if you speak your mind.
A few years ago, I lost my husband and my mother almost simultaneously, and that changed my perspective about how I communicate with people. I kept thinking about a lot of things I should have/would have said if I knew they were going to die.
I know, this is extreme because they died, but we should assume we do not know when we will see that person again, so to me, it is super important to say everything I have to say, always.
RULE 2: WITHHOLD SEX UNTIL YOU HAVE A COMMITMENT FROM THE PERSON YOU ARE DATING:
I had a matchmaker years ago on my podcast that believes women should not have sex for at least six months with a new partner. I had someone else say something similar, that women should wait until the guy is ready to commit completely.
I had a dating coach say that no men will want a relationship with a woman who goes to bed with them too soon. And the list of rules about when to sex have with a new partner goes on and on…
This is what I think: there should be ZERO rules regarding when we feel like having sex with someone. Do it on the first date, third, tenth, two, four months down the line – whenever it feels right for YOU.
The right partner will not care at all when it happened, because he will be on the same vibe as you. At the same token, it does not matter when you have sex with the wrong partner, because sooner or later, they are not the person for you.
To me, it simply has to feel good and right for me, and I think it should be this simple for anyone.
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RULE 3: FIB YOUR DATING PROFILE A LITTLE BECAUSE IT IS ABOUT MARKETING YOURSELF:
Sadly enough, most people fib their dating profiles by using too many filters, super outdated photos, lying about their age, weight, height, occupation…
I truly believe starting ANY kind of relationship with lies is a horrible idea. Social media is creating a culture where people hide behind fake photos, fake perfect realities, fake perfect lives.
The truth is, none of us is perfect and this is what makes us so unique.
When seeking the right partner, it is so important to find someone who will like us as a whole, great characteristics and imperfections too!
Not to mention that if you are lying about something and get to meet the other person in real life, they will know the truth anyway, so why waste anyone’s time.
My rule is that I want people to like me for me and exactly how I am, so my suggestion for this New Year is that we all make more clear and honest profiles, put our best smile out there and let our personalities shine through!
If you need help building a great dating profile or want me to give you an opinion about yours, please email me and it will be my pleasure! katzammuto@gmail.com
Kat on the Loose – sex, dating & relationships podcast is available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music, I Heart Radio.
If you have any questions or want to share your stories, please send us an email or follow me on Instagram @katzammuto and send me a DM. I would love to hear from you!!!
Wishing everyone an amazing year head, with lots of success, health, wealth and love !
Kat Zammuto
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Katherine Zammuto
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